September 19, 2014
6:42 am
Listener Club

Stupid News for 12/3/13

    An Oklahoma man had a gut feeling that a package he found on his front lawn was a bomb. But when he took it to cops, he found it was just an overstuffed burrito! The man was freaked out upon finding the insulated container, which had tinfoil sticking out of it. He brought it to his local precinct, where the bomb squad was called in to investigate and found nothing more incendiary than a layer of hot sauce inside. While the burrito turned out to be harmless, a police spokesman still scolded the man for bringing it in saying, "If you think it might or could be dangerous, you should not touch or move it. Call the authorities and we will investigate it there."

      A Florida crook got some payback for trying to pay back a loan - after he robbed a local sandwich shop and used three bucks of the loot to repay a woman who'd put some gas in his car earlier that day. Brian Jeffers was hanging out in front of a convenience store when a clerk came out and heard his sob story about being broke - then gave him a few bucks to get his pickup gassed up. He left his ID with her as collateral and drove off, stopping next at Larry's Subs, where he told a clerk he had a gun and demanded all her cash. Jeffers made off with $200 and headed back to the store where he'd left his ID  only to find his lender there with cops, who she called after hearing a description of the armed robber down the road.

     A middle school student in Colorado trotted out the oldest excuse in the book when a  teacher asked to see her science project - but when she said her dog ate her homework, she had the pup's vet prove she was telling the truth! Payton Moody made a working volcano out of kitchen supplies and food coloring and left it out to take to school the next morning, only to find that her Yellow Labrador Reggie had made a midnight snack of the whole thing - including the 50 or so straight pins used to hold it together. The teacher accepted a note from the doctor as proof that Reggie did indeed chow down on the project, but insisted she re-do the work anyway. She did, and got an "A" – and Reggie, for what it's worth, has made a full recovery.
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