July 25, 2014
4:58 am
Listener Club

Stupid News for 10/2/13


      A Tennessee man was taken into police custody after he tried to hunt down the pack of gorillas he thought had invaded his property - despite the fact that they didn't actually exist. The man called 911 to report that the beasts were about to break into his house, but the dispatcher thought he was just monkeying around and tried to calm him down. The counseling didn't work, and the man dropped the phone and grabbed his shotgun instead. After hearing shots fired, the dispatcher did send out an officer, who found the man sitting in his recliner holding the gun - which he'd used to blow several holes in his own door – but no sign of gorilla presence. He was taken in for a mental evaluation.
 
      Two British men earned a golden ticket to the big house after instigating a drunken street brawl while dressed as Oompa Loompa characters from the Willy Wonka movie. Louis Gelinas and Matthew Wright, who were decked out in green wigs and orange face paint for a night on the town, downed a few too many Gobstoppers and ended up drunkenly challenging two other men to a fight because they didn't like the way the other guys were dressed. Wright was sentenced to 10 months behind bars, while Galinas got off with community service.

      A pair of volunteer firefighters in New York burned some bridges earlier this month when they broke into an amusement park and ransacked the place, stealing armloads of food, then leaving behind steaming piles of poop. Eric Frisbie and Jacob Williams allegedly hosed the owners of Enchanted Forest Water Safari Park by sneaking in after hours to help themselves to stuffed animals from an arcade and a load of edibles from the concession stands. The drunken rampage also resulted in about $4000 in damages, including broken games and clean-up of the poop. The two were in town for an annual event in which volunteers are trained in new innovations in firefighting, which they won't be able to put into use, since they were both fired immediately after the incident.

 
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Location : New YorkTennessee
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