July 31, 2015
3:53 am
Listener Club

Stupid News for 8/12/14

     An airline flight was diverted to London after a drunken passenger attacked crew members with her prosthetic leg, after telling the flight crew that she wanted "cigarettes and a parachute." When they asked her to quiet down, she slapped a little girl and then started swinging with her leg. A witness said, "We were coming back from Tunisia when this lady kicked off. She was off her face on drink. She slapped a young girl and then assaulted the cabin crew with her prosthetic leg. They took it off her, but she started kicking them with her good leg." The 48-year-old was subdued and the pilot made an emergency landing in London. The woman was removed by police for questioning.

      A woman who allegedly swiped a bag of Raisinets from a Florida market felt justified because she is a "God." Nancy Mullis was seen taking a bag of Raisinets and then leaving the store. Once she was outside, the suspect "flaunted the stolen property at the store clerk." She was given a trespass warning and a court summons for theft. The candies made their way back onto the shelves at the store. Later on in the day, Mullis went to a dollar store and caused a scene. A witness said, "She was waving her arms wildly and cursing. Mullis was stating that she was a god and could do what she wanted."  The "sacred" suspect was arrested on a disorderly conducted charge and given another trespass warning.

      An Oregon man who is facing public indecency charges after allegedly into a River while pleasuring himself may want to clean up his act. Police spotted the suspect, Ernest Kirk, on a cliff near a bridge and attempted to talk to him. Kirk, who allegedly was naked and touching himself at the time, seemed to be under the influence of drugs. It was difficult for officers to communicate with Kirk because he was about 75 feet below them, and Kirk "continued to 'self-indulge' in front of them for several minutes." The Marine Unit was called in to assist with the situation. When a boat approached Kirk, he appeared to pass out and fell into the river. Authorities were able to haul Kirk into the vessel, and he was taken to a hospital for a medical evaluation.
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